they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Randomize
