come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
