so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
