careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
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