Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
