Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Randomize
