What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
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