We won't sleep together?
Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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