butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
