I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Me. At least after what I've been through.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
