So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Randomize
