the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
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