All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
