I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
