So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Life without a bra equals bliss.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
