i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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