i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
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