oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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