I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
