a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
