Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Randomize
