Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
ok first of all what the fuck
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
