): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
