white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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