What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
We have started to decorate penises.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
