He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
where are my eyebrows?
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