Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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