Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Randomize
