I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
