She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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