Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Randomize