And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Randomize
