I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
