got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
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