All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Randomize
