If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize