Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
the gays at disneyland are vicious
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Randomize
