am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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