i need an iv and a liver transplant
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
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