By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
