u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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