that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
I fill condoms, not promises.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Randomize
