He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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