We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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