I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
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