the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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