At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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