What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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