I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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