If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
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