member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Randomize
