I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
soo... how was my night?
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
